I'm Yaten, bassist and singer of the three lights. Yeah, I know, I'm popular. That's not all I am though, I also really like photography. I know it’s not a bad thing dummy! That’s why I said I loved it, I’m the badass of the badass. And stop calling me babe, Icy Eyes!
Anything you want, sweetcheeks.
Stop calling me those silly names!
“Is this man bothering you, JunJun?”
No, he’s just my friend. It’s ok Hikari, don’t worry about it.
“Oh, alright. Psst, no worries about you know what. Meeting with them soon.”
Why is he calling you sweet cheeks? Jun-chan?
Yaten didn’t budge when Seiya yelled at her. “You know better than to think I’m actually attempting to cause you pain.” She’d have hit a lot harder if that was the intention. Mistreated? Yaten was just laying on her bed with her, completely conflicted because of her. How was that mistreatment? “Come on, you know I’m not bad to you Seiya.”
Since when did Seiya act like this? She was being so confrontational. What was wrong with her? “I never told you that you were less than anything. What’s gotten into you?” She narrowed her eyes a little at Seiya. “Who are you talking to? That’s the second time you’ve said something strange.”
She looked at Yaten seriously. Her eyes didn’t hold the usual shine. Her eyes were dull, as if all the life and energy had been taken away from her. She was not the Seiya the small girl knew and loved.
“Deny it, deny it… as much as you want. But you hurt me everyday.” Her voice was low and calm, completely different from the high pitch yell she gave minutes before. “Every single day. Every one of you. You all just fuck me up every single day. How? By being happy… and by not having a place for me in your happiness. I know it. I see it. I see you being happy except when you’re around me. When you’re around me you’re always defensive, angry and whatnot. When people are around me I bring up the worse in them.” Everything was said very calmly, almost…sweetly. And she smirked. She smirked as if what she said was something good.
“You want me to stick around to watch your happiness. You won’t let me leave, you said it yourself more than once…that if I leave you’ll hunt me down. The only reason you want me here is for you to show me how happy you are. I know it.”
She started to walk away from the bedroom, not knowing if Yaten was following her, but it didn’t keep her from keep talking, only this time, to herself.
“And the funny thing is - the people I have closer to my heart are the people who break it more often. Aside from Taiki I guess. Right. Taiki is cool. Maybe I should move in with Taiki. But then again no, because she wants to be with her girlfriend and I would be just a pain for her. Yeah. What about Michiru? Michiru is supposed to be my good friend. At least I think of her as a good friend. But all she wanted was to use me to make Haruka jealous, you’re right. Now I bet she just talks to me because it would be weird if she just randomly stopped. And Odango…oh, Odango…you’re so amazing and perfect Odango, I want to be more like you. Much more like you. When you go back to his arms I’ll miss you so much.” She talked fast as if she couldn’t keep any thoughts inside herself - and she couldn’t. She’d been hiding these thoughts but now they were just slipping down her tongue.
She walked towards the kitchen and grabbed her vodka. Like she did with wine the other day, she opened it and drank it straight from the bottle. “So…fucking…painful. It feels great.” She said smiling.
Yaten wasn’t going to take this at all. Seiya was beginning to act crazy, and she wasn’t going to deal with this one bit. Walking to Seiya, she grabbed her by the collar of her shirt and pressed her back against the cabinet. She took the vodka from her hand and sat it on the counter. “Look at me right now.” Jade eyes were fixed on the blue of Seiya’s. “There’s something wrong with you. This isn’t you Seiya.” Her voice was serious.
She knew there was something big wrong. “You might be an idiot, but you’re not an asshole like this.” She stared with intent. It was intent on stopping this where it was. “Who were you talking to before? I swear if you lie to me, I’m going to beat the hell out of you right now. And you know I’m telling the truth.” She was ready for Seiya to feed her another falsehood, but somewhere she was hoping that Seiya would wake up and tell her what was going on.
(Source: star--healer)
She was shocked. Plainly and simply outright shocked. “What the hell?!” She stood up quickly. Walking over to Seiya, she reached her hand back, not far, and let the black haired starlight have it. It wasn’t a punch or a real slap. It was her hand coming across Seiya’s face just enough to get her attention. “Get a hold of yourself!” She exclaimed to Seiya, who would thank her later. “What’s wrong with you? I wanted YOU Seiya. When we were on Kinmoku, my eyes were on you.” She explained to her.
Her eyes went downward. “It ‘s only after we came here, and I met Mina-chan, and you met Odango that I stopped looking your way.” She shook her head. “You are being nice to me Seiya, it’s just not easy to feel the way I do, and hearing you say those things. Don’t you understand?”
‘She does not respect you.’
“Don’t touch me that way!” She barked. “NEVER touch me that way again. I’m tired of being mistreated.” She walked away from Yaten, to the other side of the room towards the window, still holding the bag with now melted ice.
“It’s not easy for me to know how you felt in Kinmoku and now not be able to act on that. It’s also not easy for me to be less than enough. Less than enough to anyone. Everyone wants me to settle for less than I need. What do I do? What can I fucking do?”
‘Don’t forget to mention how disrespectful she is towards you. You can’t tolerate that.’
“I know, I’m getting there.” She murmured.
Yaten didn’t budge when Seiya yelled at her. “You know better than to think I’m actually attempting to cause you pain.” She’d have hit a lot harder if that was the intention. Mistreated? Yaten was just laying on her bed with her, completely conflicted because of her. How was that mistreatment? “Come on, you know I’m not bad to you Seiya.”
Since when did Seiya act like this? She was being so confrontational. What was wrong with her? “I never told you that you were less than anything. What’s gotten into you?” She narrowed her eyes a little at Seiya. “Who are you talking to? That’s the second time you’ve said something strange.”
(Source: star--healer)
She had some thoughts on this subject, but she wasn’t going to outright give JunJun the name. She thought it appropriate for her to find it herself. It would give her a sense of pride, and Yaten wanted that for her. “He” took JunJun into her arms. “I have an idea for you. I’m not going to give you a name, but I’m going to help you figure one out.”
She walked back to the worker. “Let them know to begin painting. I want this place cleaned and construction completed by tomorrow. We’ll be back then. I want EVERYTHING to be ready, and all of what I told you to order earlier to be here and in place by then.” He nodded to the owner.
Yaten took JunJun’s hand and led her out. “Here’s what I say. You talk to your sisters, and we come back tomorrow with them. All of them. You guys look at the place with everything here, and come up with a name together.” Yaten gave a small half smile to her girlfriend.
“Woah, poor guy. I wonder how he’ll manage to do all that for tomorrow.” JunJun said to herself, but she thought it was funny how Yaten gave orders and the worker would do everything she said.
JunJun took her girlfriend’s hand and walked out with her. “That sounds better, I’m sure they’ll help me figure out a good name. Although, I’m sure PallaPalla is going to come up with the derpiest names ever, so I’m going to ignore her.” She then wrapped her arms around Yaten’s and smiled. “But I really wanna be with you right now.”
Then she remembered that she had promised Seiya she would tell Yaten about them hanging out. Seiya seemed to worried about it since she thought Yaten would make a big deal about it, but JunJun couldn’t see how. They were just friends and she couldn’t understand why Yaten would get upset about it. “So, I wanted to tell you something.” She said, not making a big deal about it. “The other day I went to get some ice cream with Seiya and then we had some pizza, and she says she likes me now and that she’s happy that we are together.” JunJun said with a big smile.
Yaten was surprised by the admitting of her girlfriend and her teammate going out together. Why didn’t she just tell her beforehand? Yaten wasn’t going to get mad about it. The end result wasn’t all bed if Seiya liked her now. “That’s good……I guess.” She told JunJun.
She was endeared to hear her girlfriend tell her that she wanted to be with her right now. It made it easier to ignore having to “be a guy”. She threw her arm around the waist of JunJun as they walked. “Pizza?” She asked. “You like pizza?” She was thinking of the bakery making pizza, but hadn’t fully decided on it yet. Perhaps JunJun would have input on it. “How would you feel about the bakery making pizza at the shop?”
Have a piece of her forever? <Please Seiya, don’t say that to me….> Two things happened to her. The first was her face going red. The second was her eyes growing sad. “Why do you do this to me? Why Seiya?” Her heart was breaking over Seiya for a third time. The questions weren’t said in an angry or mean tone. Her voice expressed true sadness.
The two parts of her clashed once again. One wanted nothing more than to get close to Seiya, wrap her arms around her and never let go. The other part told her that she was being weak and letting something trivial get the better of her. She found it hard to move, to breathe. She felt so confused looking at the blue eyed girl.
“Stop what?” She hadn’t done anything. What was that about?
She let go of Yaten’s hand and stood up quickly.
‘You have to get away from her. You have stop being so weak and depressing. Grow up. Get away from her. Listen to her. She asked ‘why do you do this to me?’ She’s so selfish. So selfish. You don’t deserve that.’
“I don’t deserve that!” She said it out loud. “You’re right. I don’t deserve it.” She said to herself and turned towards Yaten.“I don’t deserve to be asked that. What am I doing to you Yaten, besides giving you everything you want?! Everything you need?! You want to date someone? Fine, I step back and let you live your happy fairytale. I even become friends with your girlfriend. I’m being nothing but really nice to you, to everyone and you even dare to ask me what I’m doing to you? Did you think of what you’re doing to me?”
She was shocked. Plainly and simply outright shocked. “What the hell?!” She stood up quickly. Walking over to Seiya, she reached her hand back, not far, and let the black haired starlight have it. It wasn’t a punch or a real slap. It was her hand coming across Seiya’s face just enough to get her attention. “Get a hold of yourself!” She exclaimed to Seiya, who would thank her later. “What’s wrong with you? I wanted YOU Seiya. When we were on Kinmoku, my eyes were on you.” She explained to her.
Her eyes went downward. “It ‘s only after we came here, and I met Mina-chan, and you met Odango that I stopped looking your way.” She shook her head. “You are being nice to me Seiya, it’s just not easy to feel the way I do, and hearing you say those things. Don’t you understand?”
(Source: star--healer)
Feeling her hand in Seiya’s made her heart flutter. She looked at the intent blue eyes that looked at her. “I know, but……but it did mean something.” She looked away. “At least…..it did to me….” She mumbled, almost inaudibly.
“Seiya, thats a lie.” She said, turning her head back to face the other girl. “They were always complicated. You just joined into the complication late.” It was the best way she could explain it. <I wanted you near me so bad. I didn’t know how to tell you. Maybe it was my fault. Maybe I should’ve just told you> “Be yourself idiot. I didn’t tell you to be someone else.” Yaten had an idea of where that came from.
“Always complicated…” She repeated slowly. “I lived this illusion that everything was easy and perfect back then… at least it was really good for me. I imagine sometimes what it would be if you told me back then how you felt.”
Looking at Yaten in the eyes, she smiled softly - a really sad smile. “You know why I gave you this necklace?” She asked softly.
“To remind you that no matter what I’ll always be by your side. So you can always have a piece of me wherever you go. And I know…you have JunJun…and she is a special girl… I don’t mean to come in between both of you, I swear… still, I want you to have a piece of me with you forever.”
Seiya’s voice was weak, very low. She was trying to find strenght to say all she needed to say. Deep in her heart she felt as if she was slowly suffocating. The voice inside of her begun to yell at her how stupid it was for her to say these words.
‘You’re betraying yourself. You shouldn’t say anything else. Shut up, now! You can’t expose yourself more than you’ve been doing already.’
“Please…stop…” She said let out, to herself, not aware she said it out loud.
Have a piece of her forever? <Please Seiya, don’t say that to me….> Two things happened to her. The first was her face going red. The second was her eyes growing sad. “Why do you do this to me? Why Seiya?” Her heart was breaking over Seiya for a third time. The questions weren’t said in an angry or mean tone. Her voice expressed true sadness.
The two parts of her clashed once again. One wanted nothing more than to get close to Seiya, wrap her arms around her and never let go. The other part told her that she was being weak and letting something trivial get the better of her. She found it hard to move, to breathe. She felt so confused looking at the blue eyed girl.
“Stop what?” She hadn’t done anything. What was that about?
(Source: star--healer)
I’d like to do a thread at that art show. I want to have a couple of Yaten’s pictures on display there. Is that okay with you?
Yes…..I am licking a lemon.
I licked it because it was slimy
Adrian —
Christian (Adrian’s eight year old brother) —
Seiya really wanted her close. What was the meaning here? She wanted to be close to her too. Why did this have to be so hard? Yaten slowly moved a little closer, her reluctance apparent. <Why do you do this to me? You know how I feel. How you feel. What about Usagi and JunJun?>
She moved until either could reach their hands out some and make contact with the other. “Seiya…..I want to stay…and I know you aren’t like that.” Looking at the blue eyes of the other made her heart almost melt. She could see the hurt in her eyes. <Seiya….> Seeing it made her want nothing more than to take that pain away. <Please don’t look at me like that> She wanted to turn away, to yell at the other for being so down and not trying to come out of it , but somewhere in her was holding her tongue, keeping her from getting angry.
Should she remind Seiya of their girlfriends? Should she just say nothing and go along hoping this would end well? It was hard to know the answer.
She reached for Yaten’s small and delicate hand and held it tightly.
“Back in the day we could hold hands, we could snuggle…we used to sleep together even, in the same bed and it would mean nothing bad. Now, if I ask you to get closer to me, you’re all hesitant.” She sighed.
“I wish things have never gotten this complicated. I want to be able to be depressed and ask you to spend the night with me without worrying about how that’s going to sound like. I want to be able to be myself around you instead of this well behaved character I have to be now.”
She sounded genuinely sad. The bad voice inside her head telling her to shut up and not open up more.
Feeling her hand in Seiya’s made her heart flutter. She looked at the intent blue eyes that looked at her. “I know, but……but it did mean something.” She looked away. “At least…..it did to me….” She mumbled, almost inaudibly.
“Seiya, thats a lie.” She said, turning her head back to face the other girl. “They were always complicated. You just joined into the complication late.” It was the best way she could explain it. <I wanted you near me so bad. I didn’t know how to tell you. Maybe it was my fault. Maybe I should’ve just told you> “Be yourself idiot. I didn’t tell you to be someone else.” Yaten had an idea of where that came from.
(Source: star--healer)
